just for me the church bells rang. . .

it's cold and grey outside

and that's just fine with my heart

seeping into the digital world

new faux, covered in ink splatter

love surrounds my bed, and pillows piled on top to keep me warm

dear alcohol,

how i've missed you

i promise i'll never abandon you again

my sweet

xoxoxo

Serena

is my name but my family calls me

Serene

white lilies dying in my room of frost and for longed love

my paintings need hanging my needle readjusting

and my heart some mending

we beat each other to the pavement

no anger in my limp body as

i turn purple and collapse at your feet

silence

wondering what stopping would feel like

blue and purple blazing in my eyes

cold air on my skin brings me back to reality

life scattered through out my room

quite and sad

my days are long and my night lonely and dark

growing afraid of the ghosts i hold deep inside

blood dripping down my legs

release and puffy eyes in the morning

don't look at me, cast away

go sailing, name your ship after me

in the storm you are my destination,

in the port you are my storm

what's left

i have nothing more to say

Goodbye.

the week of aug 20th.

Maybe you weren't listened to very attentively as a child. Perhaps you were dressed in clothes you didn't like, hugged only three times a year, and fed food you were allergic to. I suppose it's even possible that your parents were psychotic drug dealers who kept you chained to a radiator in their squalid basement. If that's the case, Aries, I would understand if you had an urge to devote the next three decades to bewailing your bitter past and scheming up ways to wreak revenge on the cruel world. But if you have ever been curious about whether there might be better ways to allocate your time and energy, I have good news. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you now have it in your power to overcome your toughest memories and set out on a course to become almost as secure as if those bad things had never happened.

My Life According to Leonard Cohen

(fuck Bono)

Pick Your Artist: Leonard Cohen

Are you male or female: I'm your man

Describe yourself: Love Itself

How do you feel about yourself: Waiting For The Miracle

Describe your current boy/girl situation:Hey, That's No Way To Say Goodbye

Describe where you currently live: Tower Of Song

If you could go anywhere you wanted to go: A Thousand Kisses Deep

Your favorite form of transportation: Jazz Police

Your best friend(s) is(are): The Stranger Song

Your favorite color is: Famous Blue Raincoat

Favorite time of day: Night Comes On

If your life were a TV show, what would it be called: In My Secret Life

What is life to you: The Future

What is the best advice you have to give: Ain't No Cure For Love

Thought for the Day: I Can't Forget

How I would like to die: Everybody Knows

My soul's present condition: Hallelujah

chiming light savers of death's departed.

i feel the waves of the earth crashing over me

she felt so soft, even thro my pants

never been kissed before and unaccountable

stepping up to the plate, virginal, and not knowing what i'd give

silently vacuum all the glitter up from my eyes

and make plans, for falling in

with those sunset path ways thro the field

i dream of you

losing you

i dream of you

enter back into the reality

of non reality that i feel so close to

sleepy now, i smell like a stripper

and everyones long gone

to sleep in and out with redheaded angels

i want you to know that i'm thinking about you

and as i long for another's touch

i want you to know

i dream of you

losing you

i dream of you

a forgotten poem and a reanimated dream.

have you ever dreamt a dream that you had had before?

wondering if you were having rem deja vu?

or perhaps the sensation is false familiarity,

do you know what happens next because your deciding your own dreaming fate?

i stand inside peering out window pain

imagining the leaves turn golden,

falling off and snow covering the trees

bare and helpless

it reminds me of a old poem i could never remember

and now i've forgotten

the future seems so bright only to pass into it

everything the same

i wrote you a drunken lullaby the other night

soft whispers of heart felt reasoning

pounds to hard when there's refusal of a hug

practice, as i peer out my steeple windows

seems like all i ever want to do is nothing.

Sunday June 20, 2004

3:18:22 PM

Ten thousand years later, I just want to tell you: you
have the most beautiful eyes. I'm so scared I'm going
to forget something really important, but if i do, no
matter what, it won't be you.