childish i know.

i'm tired of looking back on pages of the past hoping to find glimmering foot notes and little cupids. i'm looking for my answers in the past hoping to change the future. sometimes it feels like i've learned nothing at all, especially like now when i need someone to hold me. last night a fox bite me, in my sleep, in my dream. remembering all those childhood stories with your name on the cover. i promised myself i won't do this again. letting the keys of time fill up with sweet, soft, harsh and real desires of something that i think is too good for me. that in fact is merely wearing the right mask at the right time. saving me from my loneliness, for a moment. i don't want another tyrrell or another kyle. i just want it to work. all that water just gets in the way tho. blue eyes, to close to that crisp fall day. did birds sing at your funeral, or just fly scared; from the sound your heart made. i've had a taste of blood and i want more more more. my childhood dreams were filled with chilled air and soft green covering everything. why does everything we hold for the future turn out so. . . bland compared to the daytmares and nightdreams our overactive imaginations comes up with. rainbow colored lights, asking for your number, cause your not in school today, holding in, too much. i'm a stupid sap for something i can never have again. with you or with anyone else. but i'd like to add that someone has knocked the running mate completely out of second. and if your not careful he might pull ahead to make first. so you better let me change your mind fast. my neck hurts and i'm dreaming of something far away, right here, and bittersweet.